Easter was strange. I came home just before Easter and looked forward to spending time with my family, see friends, eat yummy easter food, stuff myself with sweets from the easter egg, spend time at the summerhouse on the island and I wished for warm sunny weather. Funny enough I actually got all these things, but it was still not the same....my dad could not come back home and therefore unable to spend Easter with us.
We went to the hospital instead to visit him on Saturday (Påskafton) and for me that was heartbreaking. I had not seen my dad for over 3 weeks and he had lost a lot of weight recently. For the first time; he looked ill....skin was grey, lost over 2 stones in total ( över 12 kilo, 15 kg för att vara exakt), and I am sure the hospital setting did not help much...his too big hospital clothes and drip. But he looked nothing like the dad I know and suddenly it was an old man infront of me. It was hard.
His mood was down as well. The treatment went so well and he was so positive, he looked forward to the recovery which started well and then this happened. First infection in the PEG and then some strange reaction to the food......he could not keep anything down and after over a week with basically nothing more than a nutrition drip (närings dropp) it showed both physically and psychologically.
By Tuesday he was well enough to come home....or at least to try to. Wednesday was hard.... it felt like I was feeding him through the PEG constantly from 7am to 9pm and we still only managed 1500Kcal and most of it he did not keep anyway, as kept throwing up! Its hard to see your dad this weak...but I try to cope the best I can.
Thursday: Much better day, stay positive!! After talking to the pain unit at the hospital, dietician and his consultant (över läkare) we decided to try something different. He got a new medication preventing him from feeling sick, and they will reduce his morphine patches from 100mg to 75mg (as pain in throat is not the main problem at the moment anyway). We also stoped with the food he is suppose to eat and tried different things instead. Filmjölk (like yoghurt), nutritiondrinks, soup...all through the PEG and blueberries with full fat cream and blueberrysoup the "normal way". We also tried a bit of bread just to get the chewing going. My dad did his best to not only lay down, instead he sat up, walked around in the kitchen a bit and we even walked outside in the sunshine (even if only managed 400m).
All these things together worked and he kept all his 1750Kcal that we managed to collect!!! Yippiieee!!
How can one day make such a different?!? Mood better, looked better and yes its a bit of my old dad coming back! Fingers crossed that today is good too!
Its a contant battle with the food....but we will get there, together!!
Now its time for our 400m walk in the sunshine again! :-)
LOTS OF LOVE AND HAPPINESS TO EVERYONE